Monday, April 13, 2009

Do you subscribe to the view that love is a romantic proposition, full of hearts and flowers, or do you believe (as I am starting to) that in the end, falling in love is another deal we make.

Let's face it, we all have things we want out of a relationship - and if a potential partner doesn't have the qualities we feel are most important to us, we cut our losses and move on, right?

Have you been, or are you , in a relationship where you aren't getting the things you want and need from your partner? Are you trading lack of emotional intimacy for money or prestige?

I have been reading that we are happier in relationships where we are pretty similar to our partner - where one is not superior in any way to the other...
And after some thought I would have to agree - we are probably better off being with someone reasonably similar to ourselves...to a degree.

I'm not sure I think that money has so much to do with it, as values, morals and goals in life.
I know that when (or if) I enter into another relationship, I want to be with someone who doesn't think I'm too crazy for having the dreams I do, for wanting to live the life I do, and who supports me in being the person that I am.

To do that he would have to be aligned with me on some level yes?

And I would like to be all that to him as well, and to feel that I can morally do that, without feeling out of alignment with myself.

Any thoughts?

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3 Comments:

Blogger miss*R said...

hey Flossy,

where have I been? life took over I guess :) - time moved on and I lost track of so many blogging friends, while I went through my journey.

so glad you found me.. xoxo

6:21 AM  
Blogger Jellyhead said...

Hi Flossy, good to hear from you again!

I think I am half romantic, half pragmatic. I think there has to be some romantic sizzle, some chemistry - that defies explanation but is vital to long-lasting happiness. I'd hate to end up married to someone who was like a brother to me, not a partner. But I also agree that there are certain important qualities that are important to look at objectively. Of course, you can never have everything, but you can have the crucial elements and maybe some other good ones thrown in too if we're lucky!

Good luck Flossy - you deserve a wonderful man!

9:15 AM  
Blogger Remiman said...

Flossy,
One thought; love is about giving.
rel

6:19 PM  

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